Eccentric Productions

It’s rare these days that I feel the extreme need to hop atop my one-quarter Middle Eastern soap box and dervish-whirl hurl humus-flavored Haterade all over American pop culture. It could be because our president’s middle name is Hussein, because I’ve been heavily dipping in bleach bottles lately, or because I watched that dreadful “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan” movie and didn’t die— its probably all three. Generally the combination of my white skin and broad cynicism keep me rather quite on the topic of Middle Eastern culture …but it’s been a trying, or as I like to put it: a Gyllenhaal-tastic, week.
Everywhere I go I am bombarded by giant billboards advertising the “Prince of Persia” movie, a film I could have easily been excited about. I have always been the proud staple female friend in a gaggle of video game, Sci-Fi, and RPG enthusiasts…I dressed in costume to go to Lord of the Rings openings for cry sake. I have always been a proud dork with tons of costumes, but a human teen aged girl dressed as a hobbit is one thing, while a blue-eyed blond actor faking a British accent playing “The Prince of Persia” is another. Fictional character or not, his ethnicity is announced in the bloody title!
When I first saw the preview, I could barely believe my eyes. Two friends grabbed my arm comfortingly from either side, both to signal agreement, and as a preventative measure in case I decided to chuck my shoe at the movie screen.
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” I exclaimed later discussing the release, “Are you telling me in all of Los Angeles, a city with a Persian population so huge they call it “Tehrangeles, a skip and a hop away from Glendale (Little Armenia)”, they could not find a talented Middle Eastern actor? I know at least three.”
The Guatemalan hunk playing a Persian Prince in “300” was whack enough, but at least he had melanin!”
Though spray-on tan is not the same as burnt cork, there are elements that should still make our stomachs twist a little. This is not a form of racism that impacts law, impacts civil rights, or even spreads an overt cultural myth. This is one based on marketing, so its build to grow on you without you knowing it.
During the era of segregation in this country, Hollywood routinely treated race as an optional theme edited in or out based on distribution niche. Actress Lena Horne, saw her parts in movies cut out when those films were shown in the South. Over time, “it’s what has become habitual practice,” said UCLA cinema and media studies professor Chon Noriega in comments expressed in a Huffington Post article on the subject, “I think it’s the default setting and it takes a conscious choice to change,” he said.
A few of my friends have asked me why I expected any different from Hollywood, especially Disney, a company whose practically adopted Arab features as its go-to trademark for its evil characters in the past, and I suppose I didn’t, but I wanted to, both as an Armenian, and a white American. Jehanzeb Dar, a blogger and independent filmmaker who is a fan of the video game put it best: “It’s not only insulting to Persians, it’s also insulting to white people. It’s saying white people can’t enjoy movies unless the protagonist is white”. Double whack!
In my own experience, I have fond memories of my geek-tastic Persian college boyfriend playing the video game. Despite a very culturally rich childhood surrounded by other Persian families in Los Angeles, he was never quite comfortable in his skin, his language, or the stereotypes he never wanted to risk living up to. It may sound ridiculous to some, but that fictional game character might have helped him come to terms, even if just ever so slightly, with being Persian. We don’t talk anymore, for reasons much bigger then video games, but I do wonder how he’s taking this Gyllenhaal-ization of one of his favorite game characters. I secretly hope to hear of his near arrest in NY for having heaved a bowl of Mast-o-Khiar at the screen in protest.
The Huffington Post noted that Disney did not return an e-mail asking for comment on the casting, and I have no fantasy of a protest of this film. I’ve heard it’s much better than the recent video game action schlock I’ve seen, but I don’t intend to pay money to see it. I resent that the industry believes that somehow a British accent will bring culture to a white face, and refutes the idea that there is a market for actors of color, or that Middle Eastern men can in fact be very sexy. I’ll see the film once I can stream it for free. In this case, I think “stealing” the film is fair, after all, they stole an entire cultural identity. I’ll paste a picture of Naveen Andrews on the screen when watching so as not to have to look at Mr. Gyllenhaal. He may not be Persian exactly, but he’s Middle Eastern at least, and his English accent is real.

Ps. I creepily checked my ex’s status on Facebook (Don’t judge me, you all do it!) later the week the film came out. It said, “Dear Prince of Persia Movie, please cast some persians next time, they are pretty and will make your film sexier.” —Its not exactly a bowl of dip tossed at the screen, but it did make me smile.